Regiment Senior Speech

The four years that drastically changed my life: The Regiment Era. My experiences in this organization can not be described with words, but can with the actions that occurred. I put my full effort into this activity that I love and hope that all my “umph” made a significant difference. I have many memories but these made an impact: Traveling to Hawaii, Ohio, New York, Las Vegas, Tournaments, Regiment Traditions, and 06-07 4A State Champions. The hours spent, the stressed feelings, the late comings to school, the rage of anger, the family missed, the days of practicing, and the years of rehearsals were all trials and tribulations that I had to deal with. But when it comes down to it, it was all for the Regiment. Let this be an example to anyone who feels the same, yes at times these sacrifices and feelings will come up, but don’t forget who you are with. A hundred plus people feeling the exact same way you are at times, so just push through it and continue the Regiment ways. Have the best of fun, enjoyment, luck, skill, and success. I will truly miss you all.
Mr. Pollock, the man who made it all happen. My first encounter with Mr. Pollock’s Regiment ways was when he visited Rincon, and was checking out the drum line. He asked if anyone was going to try out and we all with no doubt about it raised our hands, because most of us didn’t know better. But let me tell you that this Regiment is no joke. When I officially was a member of the regiment Mr. Pollock was already on my case. At first I didn’t know how react so I did the first thing I knew at the time was with anger. Mr. Pollock and I went at it for a while, but then surely enough in the nick of time all the heat simmered down and I actually got to know Mr. Pollock as an individual than an individual yeller. His teachings throughout these wonderful years enlightened my musical aspect of life in a broader perspective. I’m blessed that I was able to continue under Mr. Pollock’s direction all my four years here because even if you are mad at someone at one moment, there will always be many more that you aren’t. And this was a life changing experience that Mr. Pollock truly pushed me to my limits and made sure that I could withstand the most difficult tasks. Thank you Mr. Pollock, my utmost respect is to you.
With out the Regiment’s Booster this would not be the cool thing to join. The Boosters made this family into one, and helped us out when we needed it. The times that they cooked food for us, made sure we were all right health wise, and being a mom or dad when ours weren’t around. I can not emphasize how more important they are than having each booster talk for themselves. I would like to thank each and every one of them from the bottom of my heart.
To my parents, sisters, niece, and relatives, I wish that I could have been there the times I weren’t and changed the attitudes I gave to you. But for putting up with my wacky schedules, my missed family gatherings, and just the times I wasn’t there for you I greatly appreciate it. Without you guys I wouldn’t have made it these four long years. I shed sweat and tears for this activity and you were the ones that always gave me a rag to wipe them off my face. My love for you extends to infinity and back and always will.
Thank you Regiment and Band Room for always being there for me, and as a second home. As I was always there for you through the thick and thin we eventually came out of any turmoil together. For the wood winds; Keep up the hard work, I know all the runs are difficult or you maybe you didn’t get the certain music feel or your feet weren’t in time, but stay positive and achieve excellence. To the brass; you guys and girls really kicked butt, even though sometimes I was pissed at you because you were making the same mistakes, but its all good, we all make mistakes at times. So from me to you don’t give up any little thing, and keep the strong brassy confidence that the Regiment provided.
D-SQUAD: What else can I say but you are a hand full (that’s not what she said)! I’ve been there and back, you have all seen my struggles, and my times of need and when I helped you. I tried my hardest to be the best, to be the person who was there for everyone, and just kick-butt and have fun. I hope that all my years here in this section paid off, hopefully u liked some things about me and didn’t like some things, but in the end you came to see I was just an ordinary guy. Pit: To everyone, stay strong and know that your time will come, it will take your strengths and weaknesses to come as one and become BA, so just DO IT TOGETHER and you’ll go as for as you want. For one person especially in pit, Tia, stay positive, I’ve been around block I know what you’ve been through and I’m glad you over came a lot of your obstacles in life. But there are still many to handle, and will be able to achieve it because I have faith in your talent and morals, and just because you deserve the best.
Bassline:
Julia, aren’t you glad you came back to us? Haha Even if you weren’t there sophomore year physically you were there spiritual and always will be. You as BA woman and always showed me that to never give up, even though the hardest of times. Enjoy your life JULIA. (yo-yo) *wink*wink*
Lorena, yes you’ve been on bass for 2 years, but enjoy it, you represent 4th bass well.
Juanito: STAY STRONG ESE! KEEP PRACTICING!
Adam: You will eventually get to where you want, just keep working, I can see your skills improving drastically just keep up the good work.
Dustin: You’ve been through a lot man, but I know you are a strong person, just keep working on what you want to do, and trust me you’ll get there.
Quads:
Sara: Oh Sara, it has been a long journey for you, but you’ve always seemed to keep your cool, and you can always talk to me if you need help.
Jerel: Mr. “I Wanna Be Drum Captain”, haha, Man you’ve changed in a way of more maturity and I respect that man, just be sure you keep your head up even if you make a mistake, know that someone else has made a mistake too and it’s not the end of the world.
Jay: My free styling homie, I’ve always thought you were down, and still do, so just keep being yourself and im sure with your passion you’ll make it anywhere.
Snares:
Esteban: Go practice man, haha, thanks for being there when I needed you as a friend and a fellow snare player, understand that I will always have your back.
Kris: Our last year in Regiment Kris, I know we’ve been through a hell of lot, but always managed to keep our cool, and be calm and collective. I admire your academic achievements, because I wish I had them. Enjoy your life man, I’m positive you’ll make it far one day in whatever you decide to do.
Steve: You are a short man, but nevertheless you a strong man. Congrats on being drum captain, you’ve been handling yourself in a manner of which I respect, know that you are a person who knows your morals and I could see it in you, so keep it up. I’ll see you in BD and RCC snare line later in life.

-Ryan Williams aka R.I.Dub (Bass, Tenor, Snare, and a lil cymbal)

WHEREAMIFROM?

what do i call myself, black, afro-american, or african desecent
well i dont care, meaning who can tell the difference
i wonder, and i ponder, back to wondering again
made it out the water, saved from my ancestors, no more drownin
clanton alabama where my family started and
where my great great great fam stopped slavin
made it happen, children brought down the lineage
many years suffered but scars were only scratch in our visions
so to answer the question of where i came from
boats, hut, bullshit transportation trucks
i dont know exactly, but i know where i am now
self-proclaimed californian, steady holdin it down
you can catch me running up and down nogales
amar, la puente, shakespeare, they aint far
long ways down valley, hop on grand
the 60, the 57, occasionally the 1-1-0 110
you feelin this, no BS here, just truth in its form
i might look the part, dont judge of where im from
the cities have the culture diversity
street smarts smarter than some at the universities
brain washed, learned to read this, and buy those clothes
understood one way, one way to read the clock
theres a point blank difference from optimistic and pessimistic
homes, hoods, communities, urbs all exist and
to surely place myself in a category
anywhere i can score big like Robert horry


over this:

night write.

Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini/ oops, not what i meant to say, sorry about that excuse me/ let me first off saying you are an attractive being/ meaning me seeing you, as in a dream/ showed to be reality.. i can pick you up, no cab needed ya see/ no games, pun, mis fortunate encounters with the other ones/ im not finanical upscale so dont forget to bring ya ones/ five, tens, and twenties.. just encase you have to spot me/ guaranteed to be man, hold ya hand, true romance/ givemea chance.. i wont fail ya, r.i.dub.. the gentlemen slash friend slash lover..

over this beat:

TRACK 3 VERSE 3..

[11:24] ridu13: i know you what im talking about... i thought it was goin somewhere, she thought the not thought
im sure you had similar situations.. get off the phone from a great conversation... next thing you know you're sittin conteplatin
[11:25] kamish malaikam: huh?
[11:25] ridu13: lyrics
[11:25] ridu13: my two lines
[11:25] kamish malaikam: where does the 2nd one start?
[11:26] ridu13: /im sure you had...
[11:26] ridu13: im riding over teh whole beat..
[11:26] ridu13: not pausing really
[11:27] kamish malaikam: iiight
[11:30] kamish malaikam: about what coulda happened, between me and you, now your stuck regrettin, apearrin all clue
less, reflecting upon which step to take next
[11:40] ridu13: no doubt about it, exaggeration to hyperventilating crowded emotions/ how can the train move, with no locomotion.. the constant...nonsense/ back and forth swaying with no purpose of goin'/

Track 3

Check It, its about time you heard me out
I've heard the stories, retold the fables, filled the droughts
to this extent you're another statistic in my interests
gave my 2 cents, got dissed in a wishy-washy relationship
firstly, i was too damn thirsty with the picture
in my head of just you and me
I've seen... you saw, the ups and downs scraps, bruises and falls
ALL in ALL I felt something special, more than being at the fucking mall
The gentleman is thee, the lady is extravagantly pure
but she don't know how i feel so i just open up the door
complement her, joke n kid, make her laugh, just try to live
the frontal lobe of her brain be overridden'
indecisive, her visions to me are straight blindness
could i conclude that she just don't like this?
I've been see-sawin' her on a daily basis, outrageous

GETTIN BUFF

Tonight i start my 3 and a half month journey of getting buff.

I MEAN RIPPED!


I will track each week's progress....wish me luck.


doooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

THE FRIEND ZONE

sucks

Dave Chappelle @ LAX

Realize

So who the kids gonna listen to.. huh? .. i guess me if it isn't you.

I think its too late, cuz they all in my kool-aid

Today at practice these girl were like on our jocks lol.
The drumline that is.. (the guys.. lol)
After practice they came by the band room.. (walked by) and was like heyyyyy


OMG i was crackin up, i was like oh me? :D

But who would like me? lol.

*they were cute too.. damn [should of spit game]


yayayaa tia i know 5 months 30 days thanks for the update

Fathers Day

This is my father. A man of a million traits and personalities. Growing up, he taught me all i needed to make it. Today i am very thankful for everything he does for me, even though sometimes i might not show it.

Everyone who has a father, dad, or father-figure give thanks to them whenever. It just doesn't have to be on fathers day you have to be nice in that matter. When ever it seems that he they have done something to help you in anyway, give the utmost thanks because im positive they will appreciate. I hope everyones fathers day was good, hopefully you enjoyed your time with them, and showed some family love haha.

I needed to post this because its very important i get the things like this off my chest.

I love my dad.

Facing Facts.

This week has been a tough one. I admit I actually felt the pressure of becoming a senior, from the previous week or so, i have to be very independent and deal with relations of that matter. I seem that i am capable to handle those types of things, so it looks pretty good as in a future reference. Summer school is a duzy, lots of work, but hey i messed up and i gotta work for it to get my grade what i want. Grades are a MUST in regarding of my future in whatever i pursue to do, because i've been slacking and its not acceptable. No way ima be a failure of somesort to my family, i know better, and i've been raised better than that. So in that case I've focusing on my school studies a lot. Also drumline, drumming, music.... all in the same branch has been keepin me better. I've been practicing lately to an extent that focusing on the smallest of things. I know where i am at skills wise, but sometimes for some reason i always tell myself not good enough, you don't try hard. So i am pushing myself each day, until i grad. All in all school drumming and family has been keepin me sane, hopefully i will last through 4 more weeks of this school haha.

Please, I try to be a nice guy. And sometimes people cant just take my gratitude towards them and carry it, they gotta start shit. Like its not bad shit, but its just weird stuff like idiotic things, i wanna be friendly. But i guess some people cant understand that im just that type of guy, nevertheless its just me. So i hope people will stop trippin and just enjoy life, have fun... with me if u want? LOL ... but ima be the same person day in and day out. I just try to make the best of it.

Which brings me to the next topic of "girls", the dreaded ones haha. yea yea my main focus to them isnt tryin to start anything, because #1 i dont have the time, #2 i dont have chances. :D So just to eliminate them of my mind makes me feel better. I can admire from a distant but its just like what every other guy does each day so no difference. But in time hopefully i could find someone who likes me for me.. WHO KNOWS.. *tryin not to doubt* I could probably go on and on with this subject, but ima keep it nice and short.. isuck

While i write this i see myself as a growing up young man with numerous plans later in life. In the end i wanna do what i like to do, hopefully that turns that way. My passion is music/producing/rapping, drumming, computer stuff.. hopefully i can incorporate all those. I'd love to march drum corps, tech some schools, maybe even become a drum head.. get sponsored and stay with the drumming community with the most positive vibe. And dealing with that i can also involve my music with it. And when my schooling comes i want to .. get my BA major in Computer Science minor in percussion if i can.. and get my AA in business administration.. It seems very possible, i just have to keep my head up like all say and keep striving for it. I know that i can do it.

FACE THE FACTS... life is short, goes by fast, ends for all of us.. take advantage of each day.. live it to the best capability. I could tell you that i still remember my first day of kindergarten, but now in a couple of months i am going to be a senior in high school. Seems like a year ago I was in 6th grade, a new student and all wired up. But today its a whole different perspective, it goes by too fast than you think. Enjoy life. I try my hardest to live it like that, but as you know haters, peers, family, pet-peeves can just get in your face in the sense of like .. saying you cant do that even though some might be giving you an alternate direction, keep focused on yourself. In time things will work and you will realize that you did not waste time... and no regrets will be on your shoulder.


I was i was a better person. I feel like i dont deserve certain things i get. Sadly, i made numerous mistakes with trials and tribulations. IM GETTIN BETTER. I CAN FEEL IT. NO MATTER WHAT, ILL SUCCEED. WISH ME LUCK.

-ridub

PEACE

Stay strong.

Everyone, live life to the fullest.

At times it might seem that you are under the ground, but look at the positive of things and surely enough your answers will come to you in a timely manner.

I've been put into many emotions because of things didnt work out, but i eventually got over it, even thought it took time... i always come to realize that its not that important as i thought it was and my life was easier than that persons and made me feel a little better.

Today i had a talk that made me come to my senses, i need to learn how to understand where i am in life, and enjoy every moment of it. Hectic times will occur, but try not to make them come to you than you making/going to them.

The most beautifullest thing in this world, is just like that!

shiiit gotta have fun my senior year i dont want to be all cramped up.. all i can do is keep my head up, do my best, and stay strong

-Ryan

its been a while since i actually sat down and spent some time into a blog so here it goes:

Lately i've been feelin pretty damn good.. well in the sense or case for school.. but social life its w/e.. i am a chill person and dont need things to get into my way..

but somethings would be nice, but hey nice guys finish last right?

i've been seein people stressin over this paper and im glad i dont have to do it.. i've made the best decision when i got out of that stupid ass class. i am content on where i am now... my classes are good.. my grades are way better.. im actually more HEALTHY [IN SHAPE].. i could jog 5 miles straight... i've been playing ball every friday for the past month or so.. now im feelin good.. i just gotta work on my sleep pattern and food nutrition eh haha ;P


.. gotta handle summer school now.. for 5 weeks instead of last years 6 :)

gotta make a deal with my teachers so they wont drop me out.. i am goin on vacation for like 5 days and ima miss 2 days over the limit until they drop u.. but ms hall said that if i make a plan have a not explainin my situation then they'll prob let me stay in .. hope so. [got my schedule today.. 7:30-12-30 monday-friday thats cool haha ;P

today:

was a field trip to 5 colleges intentionally but then because the time.. we permitted to only 4 colleges which in chronological order: CSULA,Cal State Dominguez Hills, Long Beach State [THE BEACH], and Chapman University.. dope dope dope colleges

i got a way more better understandin of how college is goin to be like.. and damn then GIRLS woooooooah ahah!! GIRLS .. haha.

but during the course of the trip i hung out wit my homies karlo and robert and they made it dope too

and eventually for lunch time.. we got food on second street in long beach and walked to the beach and hung and ate there.. it was coo. GOTBACK@3pm


around 6pm walked up to shadow oak park.. and balled with my community teams and the locals.. got back 845.. and now im chillin.

for the 3day weekend consists of cleaning my room, doing the recycle, working out, chillin with relatives on sunday, chillin, DRUMMING f'sho.

thanks for reading.

p.s. im drinkin water more too hahaha thumbs up for me

ONE WORD

Lakers.

;D

That felt good.

hypnotic brass ensemble

*wrote this lyrics to ^^^ their song : " WAR "


back in the day when just growing up
got introduced to music, i couldnt get enough
my parents forced fed me the knowledge that i needed
i eventually filled in the blanks uncompleted
explored different genres, venues, and grooves which moved
me (short pause) into this tunes
that got me through the trials and tribulations no hatin
made me realize what was in the store for the making
education gave its two cents, collaboration
words to context, understand what im saying
thoughts to creations, vinyls to cds,
lead me in the direction of writin this poetry

The Truth

RYAN "R.I.DUB" WILLIAMS
AND
KARLO "LENSE" SAMONTE
PERFORMING "THE TRUTH"
@ Nogales High School Poetry Show: WORDS
April 29, 2009

After School Chop Session #2

enjoy

ANY Resemblence ?

YOU ARE NOT

committed as I am.

plllllllleeeeeeeeaaaaaassssssssssse.


Want some? Try @ it.

The past is the past, and things happened, but i've moved on.. i didnt give up.


Give me some credit.

SO YOU WANNA BATTLE.. FOR WHO PRACTICES 365 days a year.. huh! Wanna see who is devoted.. my heart and soul is music.. dont fuck with me.

Hmm

Have i mistaken on what i heard this afternoon?

Do i seem that shitty.. seriously?

I've devoted myself to the group, but the group doesn't like that.

Bomb after bomb, question after question like it's an all out war, shit i dont do that shit.. what scandalizing people ..

Do you know what i've been through .. no?.. ha! listen up and ask anyone around here... i've been through the shit, felt the pain .. worked my way up the right way.. no ass kissin' bullshit ..

ya know?

No pun intended.

I wanna suceed, honestly my goals are way more structured than you.. I will just walk right over you dawg, you want my dedication?.. im sure you do..

I'm not concieded at all, not braggin.. just speakin. WHT THE FCK CANT YOU GUYS UNDERSTAND.. the difference from being cocky and confident..


And you talkin that shit about.. ooh.. I said "you suck".. shiiit im not a mean person, and all the times i helped you ..you bring that shit.. its not like it made you better or worse.. u were in the same whole you started.. its embarassing how you want things to change, while your the whole in fucking past. 3-4 years back there, still wishing that one day you'll step up to the occasion and learn?...

PLEASE.......

lemme get this straight.. 3rd straight year trying out.. same situation @ things.. sure im totally fine with that, its my life, i've made mistakes.. i am not a perfect person, its not like i GAVE UP.. get real people seriously, have i disappointed you that make ... that you care about me when my grades are down, but when it comes down to it you dont have my back in the real life for shit. you just wanna bring me the fuck down? is it that? do i seem mad?...angry ... upset? I am. No shit, ooh who is Ryan.. you know me.. shit the guy who works his ass off, but gets no true credit, true here and there i do get a good job Ryan, wow i like that, but do i get the attention i deserve.. or which i think i deserve, nahh not a fraction.

You guys think i am dumb, wooah wake up buddy, i've learned way more lessons in the book of life homie, shit i've pushed too many button in the control room? ya dig..

My future is my hands, why is it that you care when i wanna do something good for a change?.. but on my ass when its slightly bad.. and not the other person who just talked behind your back then sucked your dick?.. You like to know all of that dont you? hahha..


What am i, but i "dumb" person? nice im glad you think that too.

hey mr. smart ass, shut the fuck up..

.2

It seems alright.. but it HURT bad when i heard the announcement.. i thought our show was good, IT WAS .. but not good enough to medal im guessing to the judges point of view


breakin 90 was awesome .. i felt like i put a great part into doin so.


____________________________________


As for the next year and a half with this drumline.. i'll take it each day by day..
maybe even tryin out for tenors.. if jay quits.. i cant leave manny hanging cuz honestly.. jerel has the heart for the tenors but not that chops..


and thats the truth, thats the reason why he got cut


kris would of be easily cut too, but he can hang.. just doesnt spend enough time actually practicing..
___________________________________

And for u..

I dont know..

:(.

R.I.P Uncle Calvin

You will always be missed.

I love you, and always will.



Say hello to:

your wife aka Aunt Jackie

Cousin Maurice

Nana

Uncle Bob

Aunt Mattie

and all i didn't say..

after school fun

o dearest blog

Its been a while since i've spat the truth.

Things have been pretty good...

still curious about things, but in time.. things will show.

SO MUCH THAT I HAVE IN MY MIND.. BUT I ONNO.
_____________________________________________________________


look what i found :

LOL



CUTIE? ROFL



NTS STREET MOBB ALL DAY EVERYDAY !!

made this to Craig David's 7 Days Remix Beat

its s-a-t urday ha a lil joke, woke up and now its time, to clear my throat
basically metaphorically i am the sun
workin 24/7 to get the job done
but girl, you've got my book overdue
have my thoughts on pursue
got my emotions on, "THINK OF WHO?"
see i dont know, how to really break it down
show you where im from, and show u you're truly profound
on the m-i-c, i seem to be the grand guru lover
but in real life, the truth is... i am a lonely brother
in the game, with all my other homies.. what the deal
they say do what you gotta, foo stay real
so then, every other day i come to this
jottin my lyrics for whom i wanna enlist
have my emotions in a twist
but my goal is consis
-tent, to my most extent
i'm yours, i insist.

hook 2x: you-​are-​the-​one
lemme show you girl, where im from
through each day.... and each night
come aboard as i take you on a never ending flight

WORD? ..

i was hooked on this song when it first came out.. everywhere i was going.. i was bumping or saying this song. enjoy the lyrics while u listen to the masterpiece


Find your dreams come true
And I wonder if you know
What it means, what it means
And I wonder if you know
What it means, what it means
And I wonder if you know
What it means to find your dreams

I've been waiting on this my whole life
these dreams be waking me up at night
you say I think I'm never wrong
you know what, maybe you're right, aight

And I wonder if you know
What it means, what it means
And I wonder if you know
What it means to find your dreams

You say he get on your fucking nerves
you hope that he get what he deserves, word
do you even remember what the issue is
you just trying to find where the tissue is
you can still be who you wish you is
it ain't happen yet
and that's what the intuition is
when you hop back in the car
drive back to the crib
Run back to their arms
the smokescreens
the chokes and the screams
you ever wonder what it all really mean

And I wonder if you know
What it means, what it means
And I wonder if you know
What it means to find your dreams

and I'm back on my grind
a psychic read my lifeline
told me in my lifetime
my name would help light up the Chicago skyline
and that's what I'm
seven o'clock, that's primetime
heaven'll watch, God calling from the hotlines
why he keep giving me hot lines
i'm a star, how could I not shine
how many ladies in the house
how many ladies in the house without a spouse
something in your blouse got me feeling so aroused
what you about
on that independent shit
trade it all for a husband and some kids
you ever wonder what it all really mean
you ever wonder if you'll find your dreams

ooh la la la laaaaa

haha


phewwwwww.


ya know, i feel much better...


no hard feelings.. no upsets... just that one feeling hahhaa.


but yeah peeps, on the serious note.. i've been asking around others opinions because i don't wanna waste my time in something that i don't need to.. understand? why stress if u can make progress.. feel me?




BUT I'll wait all the time... u need <3





i know ur reading this lol.. OOH i know haha..

so yeah good luck friday.. and see u then..

_____________________________________________________

Last night's practice was pretty slow its been like that for the last 3 or 4 practices, because of people not being there.. staff missing, not feeling good... not feeling the practice (understand?).. so yeah hopefully things will get better.. i pray for it.. we need kick ass practices so when touraments come we are ready to show everyone whats up.. we've came from a LONG way hahah i remember being introduced into the new technique I SUCKED :D


and i still suck :).. so yeah gotta go practice NOW if i wanna make BD / RCC one day haha :)

latez.


T R U E L O V E I S I N S Y N C

the way its lookin

it does not look good.

im not making assumptions but... man.. whatwrongwithme

damn.. i wanna make it work too :(.



time will tell



ya know, i think i've played my role in the part...


ha... sadly.. i did what i could.

and everybody say

I remember way back when..

what?... back in the day...


back in the days.


haha as i listen to "back in the days".. it brings me back to the memories of when times were good, no stress, playing outside after school, having "friends" in the nieghborhood... cartoons and polo shirts haha :P

damn ha the people i use to hang out with haha.. i miss them, they were the definition of "cool", ha but actually yesterday i met this cool person haha

she told me to put it in this blog.. shes a "dork" as she calls herself ROFL..

but yeah she goes to Rowland.. and is in the drumline.. and she is VERY wierd? haha nah jk she seems like a mellow person.. half jap half mex.. cool huh?. but enough of her cuz she is probably still sleepin hahah LAZY :P.


im not a kid anymore, but damn i wish i were...at times the life seemed slow and relaxing but in time it by really fast. *sigh* hahaha i could remember so many damn things that i use to do... and now either im too big, or not into what i use to be haha :P


but reminiscing, it always make me think about the past, present, and future.. truly it does... and man.. sometimes it gets me stressed, happy, or somewhat upset.. ya know? im not emo or anything.. but shit just happens lol.

and as i think about what is going to happen later in my life.. i wonder if things will turn out the way i'd like it to turn out, ha a lil selfish maybe?.. but wouldnt u want the same..
_______________________________________________________________

I need to talk to you, on the serious note. We've been here and there, but i think its time that i truly say whats on my mind, even though u might have assumptions of what i am thinkin, DONT.. because until u hear it directly from me, u have no idea.. understand?... Once things die down... and start to relax more... hopefully our two tracks in the dirt will create a road.... in the end i just want the best for both of us no matter the outcome of the situations, just realize that your something special and.. dont let anybody or anything stop u in pursuing your goals/dreams.. strive.

;)

please .. :). make my dreams come true

everyday that goes by

is the same o thing...


today, i pushed myself out of bed, and wrestled with the clock.

uhm hm, i had to walk to school ahah my parents were lazy, damn sucks huh?

its alright.. cuz it was pretty chill

i was trippin last night.. staying up all late.. trying to do work which i feel asleep on which i usually do.. and to learn that the grading period is due next friday so i have time.. and my chem notebook is due monday hahaha

wow thank god i actually did my chem notebook day by day for this last tri-semester.

:)

__________________________________________________________________

the time seems to be gettin closer and closer to the time that will make u so happy..

hopefully i am not over thinking things.. but im finally gettin the nerve to show u where im coming from? ya know..

shiiiit lol.

well hopefully my weekend gets better.. history test 7am tomorrow..

then dline practice 9-1..yeah HW.. and SLEEP this weekend. hahhaaha

sounds good right?


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into a scene to seem to what is seemed ROFL.


-dreams seem to be dreams

my exit's here, i hit the bell for the bus STOP, still in the zone..

currently playing: Kero One - In A Dream

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Sup pplz,

Lately, i've been livin in a dream.. such as the lyrics are in Kero One's song 'In A Dream.' Dreams to me are mysterious and very obstract... not always telling the truth but at times revealing a secret that you need to know. Sometimes for the good, and sometimes for bad. Understand? See, when i also talk about dreams.. it could refer to goals/wishes.. in that kind of nature, but in the end that are all somewhat fairytale. Until one of them are complete those fiction thoughts come to life.

What do you think dreams are really about?.. has any of them had significant difference in one of your days?

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Another thing i'd like to get off my chest is that.. i think i am TOO nice... :(.

see "im torn, but i know where my heart is"

I know how to treat.. you.. him.. [HER]... right?!..

but how cant other people realize that im so willing for others. At times it seems like people wanna take advantage ... DONT TAKE MY KINDNESS FOR WEAKNESS... even if so... i dont know what to do

see this can sooo tie into girls, they dont see me as the person who i really am.. i've never really wondered why things never worked out for me... never is a strong word, but its NOT happened. Yes there are many fishes in the sea, but the ones i wanna pursue something with are allergic to me.. relationships are soo wierd.. i always thought that being respectful and nice.. and having a good attitude towards them would work out for the best.. but i guess not?.. the saying must be true nice guys finish last.. ?

OR IS IT?

See .. the damn nice guy thing i do to every one and its just WHO I AM REALLY AM.. a nice guy.. i am a cool mellow dude thats just chill ya know, but the nice guy trend ties into the "friends" cateorgies which ties into the "i dont knows" .. which ends up to the "sorry's" ... which i get ... 100 percent of the time.. cool huh?

No worries, i guess because time will tell, but .. dam man.. i feel like... shit sometimes because i dont know what to do? have u ever felt like that.. u just dont know what to do.. so u end up making a excuse of why u are like that or feeling that way.. and try to make the situation better..

I try that.. music..drums..family.. its all the love for them.. but i need love to..


i thought karma worked? :(.



-dreams are fckd up.

"Title"

just a lil rap i made ...

to my song's beat.. OVER THERE -->


[talking]yo whats up if u dont know by now.. lemme tell u a quick story, check it just listen...[done talking]

year 1991 a couple days before x-mas
everybody round' my mom to see whats next
granted smiles and love all in the atmosphere
knowing a gifted child was about to appear
my moms said i was a dream waiting to come alive
so i did what i had to do, and come into their lives
Ryan Immanuel Williams was that baby boy
Regina and Milton Williams'yes, their pride and joy
the little kid with succes in the future to come
each day showed them what my heart was made from
respect, dignity, class, and my own little style
gave me the strength to make it through the trial..s
and tribulations, the good and bad times for sure
under estimated but who cares i endured
took time but i grew up, and here i am today
the nice guy, ha, but dont take my kindness for weakness
(slow talking while it goes into the chorus)i am who i am.. what can else can i say


______________________________________________



I was going to put something else down,

but i want to leave it on a good vibe ya know?

so ill hit u up later



I was/am my mom's dream.



-peace.

and so i ponder..

about the times that we might have.
caressing questions i singin from my mic stand
like damn what these feelings im revealin
like if i tell the fellas i get smacked in my mellon
but its unique love..only women can provide
________________________________________________________



Hey there,

yesterday was a day that really questioned my actions in drumline..

do people care if i try hard, or not.. people call me .. this and that but i just respond with yeah yeah w/e.. i work hard.. and what u want from me

but when its in front of other people.. i feel that the drumline staff treats me like shit at times, man i swear manny was messing up.. like sick.. i didnt hear any yellin

just "oh manny, can u move over a lil bit, there ya go.. good job".. and if other people would mess up around him, they blame .. the other people who were right.

he gets so much shit like being babied and shit all the damn time, he thinks he is always right, has no idea of how to deal with criticism, well he better because shit he does more than anyone on the damn dline. MR. DLINE CAPTAIN i swear grow the fuck up man.. go practice.. go learn some respesct man.. i have no idea on how u got into the fucking captain position.. u joke around and think that politics and talking funny makes a good leader.. please.. take actions that are fair.. fucking people who won u in are people who just were ur friends, not knowing of me... all the fuckers know what i've been there.. and where i've come.. i put a whole fucking year behind me.. so i can stand up for the damn team.. and marched tenors, for the TEAM!!... a whole year.. focusing on the traits of being a better person, and staying real to myself, gettin advice about things, and giving advice.. helping people and gettin help..!!!!!



its not like my first time that this had happened, so i am like what...

AND WHEN I... THE GUY WHO HAS MOST EXP THAN ANY MARCHING PERSON..

A FUCKING HARD WORKER, DEDICATED, AND PASSIONATE REGIMENT MEMBER...


ryan!.. what are you doing!.. blah blah blah.. and im like wtf..

i try not to get mad, cuz thats one thing i gotta work on my temper,

but damn if u would see how they treat different people in the life of ass kissers.


man its not like im being bullied that like 24/7 but when i do.. its so un called for..

i admit i mess up, im not perfect.. but shit.. i give a shit.. haha.. i know numerous people who are just in dline to be in dline.. they are sooo "cool"


:( makes me so upset on how hard i work.. and it seems like i get treated like shit sometimes... i know the whole dline this year is dealiing with new staff, but... damn!

ALRIGHT IM SO GLAD I GOT THAT OFF MY CHEST, IM NOT GOING TO BE DEALING WITH THAT BS ANYMORE ;)




.......

sorry im not trying to get things so tense..

but the later night.. the lakers won again :)

smashed the suns...

hhaha :D

.......


I've been thinking a lot of lately, as u can tell from above.. and for other things too..

i've made a decision to pursue to the next step, to try to see how things would work.. i honestly dont care what other people think.. i am true to myself.. and i always will be..

hopefully things work out


i pray for the best





Dreams can be altered and twisted around, before you can truly wake up in the reality of it.

Blogaholic

Sup peeps.

lately i've been hearing stuff, but like i dont know whats up..

peeps gotta inform me about things, before i learn them on my own..

the harsh way.. ha, i must be trippin.



hope not.

Whats Todays, But Yesterdays Tomorrow

My dad gave me a big ass lecture on respect/disrespect.

I felt like i was 8 years old, being told what to do/not to do.

He told me that when i am older, and i have one more year until i graduate that my goal is to pursue into college.. get your BA, then your masters, and then probably your doctorate.

At this point all i am saying is "ok"... and nodding my head politely...

Enough of that
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On the good note, the lakers won <3.. 46-10.

I actually found my trackball rofl.. @ 11pm last night.
I was like fuck this i am going to find this, and first place i looked behind the piano there it was in two pieces, the trackball, and the silver ring to hold it in place... as i place the ball [thats not what she said] in the slot it functions immediately :D... and then the silver ring was being stupid so i kinda forced my way in their.

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And on another note, i keep having these wierd ass dreams, it was pretty scary... like creepy towards the end.. these fat dudes were fighting and one got hit in the chest really hard.. and see i dont get it, i am guessing i am the narrator cuz i know all in the dream right, i'm like the guy who died's soul or something.

from that blow, he died for "4 minutes" until this chick[no its not you, lol] that was in my other dream two night ago or so.. she wished him alive... yes yes.. long story, but the girl is very upset a couple nights ago and she was crying heavily, so God (i am guessing) helped her out and granted her wish that I WAS BACK ALIVE

(im goin back to my past dream)

So then im back alive in my bed.. i put my arm out to see if anyone is there, cuz im under the covers and scared as fucked, and i feel her body.. then yeah.. i woke up, no shit.

[back to last night]

well that chick, wished the fat guy back to life also... and i felt him come back to life.. and it was soooooo wierd... there was screams.. like a heavy force, all these different things for him to come back...

BUT the freaky thing is that, when he sat up... i was back into my dream a couple nights ago ;O ... oh shit lol.

[real life]

so im pretty much freaked out to go to sleep anymore.. and stay up its like 6:45.. and my alarm is @ 7.. so who cares

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Lately, i've been pretty stressed out, this is going to be probably my longest entry for a while....

So many things on my mind, and it is pretty hard to keep them all in tact, and in focus. School (present and future), Family, Drumline, Future, My Businesses, My Family Businesses, Reunions, Girls, MYSELF... it might not seem like a lot, but on my mind its being stressing me out hhaha

thank god for music right?... so i am able to chill @ times and put on a couple of jams that im diggin, but then again.. its always going to be back to force me into the stress mode . AHHH!

I'm getting help on it, i'm realizing on what i need, and what i want. After anyone differentiates those two categories than usually life comes at them a little easier.

Priorities to Likings.

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But then again :D.. life is good right now..

My cold is almost offically over, and i'm being feeling right great.

I can finally get back to my dline which i've missed out on a couple of rehearsals but its cool, im here for good again.. :D

And hopefully sooner than later i can get back to you, and show you how much i care, but i am not trying to be mister nerd at the moment. I feel that, when i choose the right time, to see where things are... things should be @ the place to move on into better things.


OFF TO PRACTICE!!



dreams are so strange, lol.


-Ryan

my dad is fckd up.

Alright yesterday, i was on the computer.. and dying of hunger... and then i realized that my dad went out to do something so .. might as well ask him to pick something up right?

NO, wrong.. i was so wrong.. while i was on the phone he was like "no, im doing something at the moment"..and i was like fine no big deal.. joking the subject away then i hear the garage open immediately after i said ok.. and it was him.

SO I HUNG UP THE PHONE

im wrong again, shouldnt of done that... he came in the house and we like why did you hang up on me, and im like you were just there the garage opened and.. "whyd u fucking hang up on me"... "im not like one of your fucking hoodlum friends, do i look like one of your fucking friends"

then he's all up in my face, and im like what...(in my head of course) [why is he gettin all mad, he opened the garage, and i thought i could talk to him then.. so i hung up]

He grabbed my phone, and said yelled and threw it across the fucking room.

there goes my 300 hundred dollar blackberry pearl.. going flying for a trip.

GREAT.

i just walked upstairs didnt say a word, didnt even look at him, didnt even try to get my phone.

so for about 6 hours i was without a phone, bored as fuck, trying to make things right with myself, soooo i waited like a theif until the right time was there.

my parents went to their rooms.. and i snuk (is that a word) downstaris retrieved my phone which the battery was out.. sim card on the table.. and MY TRACK WAS MISSING!

so now i have a blackberry pearl with no fucking trackball.... wow.

and i can only get to messaging with the keys because... thank god i programed it.

so txting is basically my only option now ...


DREAMS DO GET PRETTY FUCKED UP.

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edit:5 min after posting

i had some wierd ass dreams too rofl....

i wont get into it, but something about basketball..

band,girls, scary shit, and my ear drums exploding..

bye. rofl.



-YEAH DREAMS ARE WIERD

yes we can, change the world

i feel good,

haahhha


maybe not 100% physically but im gettin there ..

as for mentally, oh yeah im trying hahaha :D

untitled

I'm finally not as sick as FUHK. :D

so im back to my somewat normal self, it was my first day of school today in the week, and my last :)

i didnt miss as much as i thought i was .. so thats a plus..

right now im contemplating on writing some lyrics down, or makin a beat, or just drumming outside hahha...

hopefully later today i get to go to the guard performance, and show some support to them, cuz tomorrow ima be knocked out :D...

things so far are going good in my life, I WANT THEM TO GET BETTER hahaha, but ima chill for the moment, ya know.

im glad, i hope shes glad, i hope i get my act together because i know im know im not perfect and i have a lot to learn.

ms. nerd cant fix her webcam .. im out


"i keep on looking for a.....a brighter day... all i see is time slippin awayyyy"



-Al Green - i wish you were here

SICK.

see im not usually sick, but the past weekend finally caught up with me -___-


haha i think saying hello to my dad got me even more sick, cuz his cough is so bad, it make me look 100% healthy.

im enjoying my time being home and my mom taking care of me :P.. but then im not because school is just going to through some much shit on me hahaha..

I HOPE THAT tomorrow i'll be able to hit everything back to normal, and go back to school ... and dline practice... i missed last nights :(

damn i hate when i miss practice, cuz its another day i cant get good @ what i love ya know?

shit happens, so i gotta know that... take it easy and chill

One day, american idol new judge, i swear she said riff like 100 times. :D

im out back to nyquil, tylenol, and gargling with warm SEA salt water haha

-peace



dreams are all around you

Some lyrics

yes girl,​ your the one.​.​.​thats​ on my mind
matte​r a fact could​ i.. pleas​e make you mine
its been a while​,​ and i've been reall​y diggi​n your style​
from the way you walk,​ to the way u smile​
yes, i've been pushy​ at times​ its gonna​ stop
take a minut​e,​ relax​,​ as i massa​ge your thoug​hts
im the lover​ slash​ frien​d
from begin​ning to end
the one that will be there​ to hold you throu​gh the night​,​ compr​end?​
lets amend​ the past
rescu​lpt the prese​nt
the futur​e is near
cant u feel my prese​nce?​
there​s nothi​ng to fear
as we take time to step away from our peers​
and try to pursu​e roman​ce , its wierd​
at first​,​ but we can make it happe​n
the good times​,​ the bad times​,​ the here and there​ child​ish trant​rums
i devot​e mysel​f to you, and i am utter​ly true
your the one, pleas​e make my wish come true

Thinking

As i think about what happened in the last week, i ponder on the question.. was she meant for me? Did i even try hard enough?

Was it all a game.. haha damn, things are way different now, but i want it to return to the original status.


As of now, i dont know what i really want to do, i'd like to continue and pursue into convincing and showing her that im the one.

BUT.. then again, it might not be for me, i have to learn to take each day by itself and to not get all caught up with the "he said she said" BS.

I wouldnt mind her one bit, but wont bother until she's ready.


everyone around you has dreams.....


-peace.

WOW

Lots of things happened yesterday, truly for the best of all situations.

I am not angry, i am more confused and puzzled.

Ha, yeah at times i thought i was the one being played on even though... it really didnt seem that way..

her face was not :) .. it was :| .

I hope that things will get better... and hopefully i can forget whatever happened those some-ought days ago...

HOPEFULLY, today will be a great and exciting day



everyone has dreams.


-peace

whose world is this?

THE WORLD IS YOURS...

ITS MINE ITS MINE ITS MINE.


ha ^ = lyrics to Nas' - The World Is Yours


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lately, i've been thinking lots of things that had happened in the past, and things that are currently. ive tried to think out how to deal with each problem, but at times it just seems like its pointless.. ha only a couple people know my prob, but i can make u relate.

say if you were doin "something" for a long time and thought it was the coolest thing.. but later in your life that "something" didnt seem to be..cool anymore.. and u had less interest in it.

____________________________________________

another thing is that i have been enjoying my last 6 months

haha things have been going the way that i would like it to be, but i dont wanna mess up.. i feel like im kind of pushy @ things, and tooo frantic of what will happen.

You only have one life to live, but i realized that stressing that much over ANYTHING will make you crazy..

I just hope that one day i'll feel relieved from my feelings....

and make it for something else tooo...

WE ALL HAVE DREAMS.


-peace.

sup

Damn, i can't believe i have one of these, but might as well have some fun with it.
Today I had a long practice, at times got fustrated and at times i got my "laugh" on. But on a more serious now, im really happy that my parents stopped fighting, because it wa ticking me off, like seriously i couldn't concentrate numerous thoughts be blastin in my mind all the time, f'sho.

But now that everything is everything, IM GLAD who i am ya know?...

At the moment i'm in LA, chillin wit my sister and stuff man.. the Wii is fucking dope haha

I had to get out of the house.. go chill.. get those problems dealt with chill time.


im off to play wii for another hour then sleep.

peace