and so i ponder..

about the times that we might have.
caressing questions i singin from my mic stand
like damn what these feelings im revealin
like if i tell the fellas i get smacked in my mellon
but its unique love..only women can provide
________________________________________________________



Hey there,

yesterday was a day that really questioned my actions in drumline..

do people care if i try hard, or not.. people call me .. this and that but i just respond with yeah yeah w/e.. i work hard.. and what u want from me

but when its in front of other people.. i feel that the drumline staff treats me like shit at times, man i swear manny was messing up.. like sick.. i didnt hear any yellin

just "oh manny, can u move over a lil bit, there ya go.. good job".. and if other people would mess up around him, they blame .. the other people who were right.

he gets so much shit like being babied and shit all the damn time, he thinks he is always right, has no idea of how to deal with criticism, well he better because shit he does more than anyone on the damn dline. MR. DLINE CAPTAIN i swear grow the fuck up man.. go practice.. go learn some respesct man.. i have no idea on how u got into the fucking captain position.. u joke around and think that politics and talking funny makes a good leader.. please.. take actions that are fair.. fucking people who won u in are people who just were ur friends, not knowing of me... all the fuckers know what i've been there.. and where i've come.. i put a whole fucking year behind me.. so i can stand up for the damn team.. and marched tenors, for the TEAM!!... a whole year.. focusing on the traits of being a better person, and staying real to myself, gettin advice about things, and giving advice.. helping people and gettin help..!!!!!



its not like my first time that this had happened, so i am like what...

AND WHEN I... THE GUY WHO HAS MOST EXP THAN ANY MARCHING PERSON..

A FUCKING HARD WORKER, DEDICATED, AND PASSIONATE REGIMENT MEMBER...


ryan!.. what are you doing!.. blah blah blah.. and im like wtf..

i try not to get mad, cuz thats one thing i gotta work on my temper,

but damn if u would see how they treat different people in the life of ass kissers.


man its not like im being bullied that like 24/7 but when i do.. its so un called for..

i admit i mess up, im not perfect.. but shit.. i give a shit.. haha.. i know numerous people who are just in dline to be in dline.. they are sooo "cool"


:( makes me so upset on how hard i work.. and it seems like i get treated like shit sometimes... i know the whole dline this year is dealiing with new staff, but... damn!

ALRIGHT IM SO GLAD I GOT THAT OFF MY CHEST, IM NOT GOING TO BE DEALING WITH THAT BS ANYMORE ;)




.......

sorry im not trying to get things so tense..

but the later night.. the lakers won again :)

smashed the suns...

hhaha :D

.......


I've been thinking a lot of lately, as u can tell from above.. and for other things too..

i've made a decision to pursue to the next step, to try to see how things would work.. i honestly dont care what other people think.. i am true to myself.. and i always will be..

hopefully things work out


i pray for the best





Dreams can be altered and twisted around, before you can truly wake up in the reality of it.